When confronted with a conflict, disagreement, or otherwise, don’t make things worse by arguing. Getting mad, arguing, name calling, and swearing does not help anything. Most times when you get all emotional during a confrontation it means you don’t know how to control your emotional state. When this happens you are not thinking as clearly as you could be. Swearing and name calling once again shows your lack of control over your emotional state as well as it shows that you really can’t make up your point of view. Instead of using your words intelligently you show you don’t have much to say.

Instead of arguing and letting things get out of control you should be thinking about how to resolve the situation as peaceful as possible. Staying calm and truly listening and seeing the other person’s view points before you start thinking about what you want to say. Lots of times we don’t fully listen to what is being said. Instead we hear a few words and already start to formulate our counter arguments. We should seek to fully understand others before we start to understand our side and then try to compromise as best we can.

Today’s technology does not help us much in this. Too many times people use their social medias like Twitter and Facebook to lash out against one another. Having heated arguments online whether in private or in the public eye for all to see. And this can happen via email as well. It is too easy for people to sit behind a computer screen and type away on the keyboard. They don’t have to have the other person face to face. They see the computer as their protection. When they have this “protection” they become braver than they really are. They will say things they normally wouldn’t say if they were in front of you. The same goes for road rage as well. Some people in in their vehicles and they become maniacs. As if two thousand pounds of steel and rubber are going to protect them from their actions. We should treat all situations as if we are talking to the person face to face.

We all should resolve within ourselves to try to make every conflict, confrontation, disagreement, and etc,. as peaceful as possible. Choosing to listen and have compassion for others and their view points. To stay as calm as possible and truly trying to work things out. But also to know when to just walk away as you realize that some people you cannot reason with. They are not worth the bother and your happiness and sanity is more important.

Master Jonathan Field

Cobourg Tae Kwon Do

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